I hate the term “work/life balance”. As a mother of five kids, it feels like an unachievable goal, and I always seem to fall short somewhere. Reaching that elusive balance can be one of the most challenging aspects of being an entrepreneur. Our work doesn’t get left at the office, it follows us around wherever we go, sometimes whether we want it to or not. We set boundaries, but they often shift and change as rapidly as the weather.
Let’s use a day at my house as an example. From 6:00 am until 8:30 am is a crazy time, because I have three different kids in three different schools. First, I make sure the teens are up and eating breakfast, then I drive to school, then run home and fit in an audition or two.
Next, I run into the house to make breakfast for the second time that day, and I make sure my youngest is dressed and his homework is done. Spoiler alert, it usually isn’t. Then we read together, go to the bus stop, and wait for the bus (that’s always late). I usually check emails and messages during this wait, even though I know I should be socializing with the other moms. But I just don’t have the energy.
Then, it’s back home to try to get the rest of the auditions in by 9. After that, it’s back in the house to clean up from the morning chaos, and then I usually pick produce in my garden, weeding, and possibly grocery shopping.
By 11 it’s back in the studio to work, market, and maybe do a session depending on the day. Oh, and don’t forget to check in on social media, make a post on Linkedin or TikTok, and engage with others’ content.
Kids ready for school? Great, now it’s time to start your day.
Are you tired yet? Because at this point I haven’t even had lunch.
All that is assuming that a child isn’t sick that day, no one has a doctor’s appointment, and my older kids don’t need me. I usually try to fit some exercise in, but honestly, it’s usually the part that gets left off.
Sound familiar? Your day might look different, but we all have our own brand of chaos, don’t we?
So how do we find a path that leads to a successful career AND a happy healthy life in the midst of the beldam?
The first step is essential for all of us: you need to truly understand YOUR personal definition of success.
Success looks vastly different for each of us, and you will never truly be happy following someone else’s path. If you don’t know what success looks like for you, how do you know what you’re working towards?
Me, I always feel a little frustrated when I start comparing my career to my peers without a houseful of kids. But, my definition of success looks much different than theirs: success in my career comes back to the reason I started working in the first place. I had one goal, and it wasn’t fame or fortune, it was to be able to support my children in college so they could graduate without debt.
I have to constantly remind myself that it’s okay if I don’t achieve the same benchmarks as my peers because we aren’t reaching for the same stars.
Something that really helps me is to focus on work/life prioritization rather than work/life balance. I can never truly do everything at once. No one can! Instead, I focus on identifying what is most important at the moment and letting the rest go. Sometimes that means that I shut the studio door, and trust my family to take care of themselves so that I can meet the needs of a client. Sometimes that means that I lock the studio up and focus on being fully present with my family inside my home. I have to constantly be triaging my time and deciding what is most important – and truthfully, sometimes it takes a kid pulling my phone from my hand to realize that I need to put work away.
If you have a partner in your home, their support can be important in achieving the success you are after. My husband has never done a voice-over in his life, but he can talk about the industry like a pro. When I mentioned to him that I might want to begin this career journey, he was all in from the very beginning. I remember one night I came into our room after getting the kids in bed to find him with several tabs pulled up on the computer with microphone options. He listens to me, provides a sounding board, and even spends time researching and coming up with ideas to help me grow. This communication and support is vital to success.
Another thing that really helps our family is to hold a family council at the start of each week. We coordinate what needs to be done that week through a shared digital calendar that everyone is required to update. The calendar helps, but those face-to-face conversations are vital. I have ADHD, and this helps me to stay on track and helps my family support each other in our various needs.
I also encourage you to outsource – and I’m not talking about business here! If you can afford it, hire a cleaner, find a sitter to help a few hours a day, order your groceries for pickup, or pay for a meal delivery service.
Even with the support of my family, prioritizing what’s most important, detailed scheduling, and outsourcing some things, it’s still a constant challenge. I’ve had to learn to let some things go. Recently we gave away our chickens and downsized our garden. I also stopped spending as much time on hobbies like woodworking and baking. These are all GOOD things that add to my life, but they also draw on my time. Sometimes we have to be willing to let go of what is good, to focus instead on what’s most important to our definition of success.
So, what do you think? Is work/life balance a lie? I suggest that instead of seeking balance, we find ways to prioritize our lives and recognize that we can achieve our version of success through the support of our family and friends – and that is where true happiness lies.
Check out our free PDF with pro tips from real working voice-over actors here!
Want to learn more about voiceover? Sign up for our introductory VO webinar.
